It looks different from the outside. Note from author: Boy, posting this up for the whole world to see is feeling naked, here. It’s a struggle reading this after writing it. My ego would like you to know that it took every thing in me (sans ego) to hit Publish. It’s my hope that by …
Yesterday’s journal entry June 12, 2019 So… Today, I pulled my blood companions close. I realized our relationship has been fragmented. Sisters were pitting against each other. Bickering, animosity, enmities, suicidal ideologies and betrayal have been ongoing. One child was even feeling so hopeless change would come, she started having homicidal ideologies late, last September. From …
For the past couple of days, I’ve been going through my thoughts about other people. Why don’t I have many “others” in my life currently? Why do I pull away when someone reaches towards me? What’s setting me off people? Do I even desire companionship beyond my children and a few, choice adults? For starters, …
This morning I was awakened to the largest, loudest thought: our children are like Satellite Dishes… What we put into them comes out. They have no prior programming, and will show our behaviors to us, constantly. They mimic us. They know nothing else to compare life to.The mental and medical field will tell us our …
WORK! On March, 2018 I decided I would begin drawing my life. It was far too much holding all these pieces together in this mind; so much didn’t make sense. I started with a victim/god drawing. I didn’t know why any god would let a child they loved endure the shitty life I’d found myself …
School is officially over for the neighborhood. My oldest still-in-school finished her college prep school Wednesday. What a change this school has been for her! For the past five years since I’ve been on my own, I’ve watched this little girl grow from an innocent, ‘wild child’ who took no crap, into an exhausting, co-dependent …
The smell of lilacs is wafting into the kitchen, swirling the top of my green tea into whirls and curlicues. The sun is warming my back. My companions are slumbering. I don’t have to go to a job for someone who doesn’t appreciate me today. I am free to create my artwork and guide the …
